God, Life and other things.

So the other day I had an eye opening experience and because it was so ... momentous, I feel the need to share it.

As a 19 year old girl in her second year of university, I don't have my life together. I don't know where I'm going. I don't know what path I'd like my life to follow and that's ridiculous. What's even more outrageous is the fact that I'm just now discovering that I don't have my affairs in order. I was always the girl who knew what she wanted to achieve; a 3.7 GPA, graduate with a first class honours bachelors degree, a successful entrepreneur, a successful marketer, a firm woman of God. But knowing where you want to go and what you want to do without planning for it is like being in a sinking ship. In said ship, you know you need to swim to safety (you know what you need to do) and you know that since you can't swim, you need swimming lessons (you know what needs to be done). But the point is, you. cannot. swim. So you need a plan:- who can teach you to swim? How quickly can you learn to swim? Do you really need to learn to swim or just to glide and kick? Your plan would answer all your questions and point you in the exact direction in which you want to go.

This analogy (given to me by an extremely wise friend) is exactly how we need to approach life. In light of my vast unpreparedness, I started to seriously plan my life; here are some of the key things I looked at:

1) Education & Career:
   - Where do I want to complete my masters degree?
   - What company and what position am I trying to get into when I graduate? (Or possibly before I graduate)
   - In terms of careers, do I have a plan B? C? D?

2) My spiritual Life
  - There is more that God requires of me, what is that 'more'?
  - How will I use my position in the church to impact the church?
  - How can my witness win more souls for Christ?

3) Relationships
  - Are my current friends a good support system for my future?
  - Do I see my current romantic relationship as the one that will develop into marriage?
  - At what age and stage of my life do I want to get married? Why?

There were a slew of other subtopics and questions but these are just to give an idea of how totally unfocused I was on life and of all the decisions that I am facing now and will be facing soon. So, honestly ... this was very frightening for me; y'know, coming into the realization that life is happening now and serious life choices are being made now. Ensure you're prepared for life. Try to make the right choices. Try to make informed choices. Try to make mature choices. Because the choices you make now are already affecting your future life.

If you fail to plan, then plan to fail.

Christianity: Affairs of the heart.

Okay, so lemme start out by saying that, this post will not be about relationships from a Christian point of view. And to tell you the truth, I don't really know where I'll be going with this piece.. But I've digressed.

Christianity is purely a matter of handling the affairs of your heart and acting upon that. Never heard it put that way? Lemme explain. People generally think of Christianity as that religion where you stop having real fun to do what they say God says which is actually boring and not at all what you really want to do. But it's not at all that. Not even close. I would like to clearly state that I am not of the belief of forcing people to become Christians or forcing them into churches. I strongly believe that Christianity is a matter of understanding just how much God loves us so we can in turn offer him our lives - our entire lives- as "repayment" for everything he did for us out of love. Christianity is about falling in love with Jesus, thus "Affairs of the heart".

Falling in love with Jesus is not less intense than falling in love with your boyfriend/girlfriend. As a matter of fact it's way more intense. Loving God - not his many attributes- is such an overwhelming feeling; it feels like you're being totally drowned in affection... the more you fall in love with him is the more he gives you reasons to love him. The cycle of reciprocated love with God is the greatest feeling in life, I promise.

The issue is, as humans, (it is my opinion that)we are incapable of fully loving as God loves. So, God loves us through absolutely everything we do. e v e r y t h i n g. But we don't do the same. And so we sin. And break our God's heart. Our Saviour. Our friend. Our only true love. And He in turn loves us even harder so we may come back to him and seek forgiveness. But the cycle then starts over and He must endure the pain of our sin and betrayal again. and again. and again. We continuously break our Master's heart just for Him to mend it and piece us back together again and continue loving us with his unconditional love.

And all He asks of us is that we come to know Him; come to love Him. He asks that we give Him all that we have ... He asks that we fully surrender what little we have so he can bestow on us the bountiful blessings he has stored up for us. God is calling us to a personal relationship where He can be our father and our friend. He asks us to surrender our hearts and our will to Him because He knows that the result will be nothing but greatness. He seeks us out and requests that we obey Him so that he can transform our lives and blow our minds.

Will you give in? Will you give Him authority over the affairs of your heart?